Today there are more and more men and women begin to complain that after sex feel a little upset. And the point is not that all are undermined by financial crisis and flu virus, – so was always, but was accepted to be silent about that.
After sex instead of euphoria and joy I feel emptiness and grief. And the point is not that I am dissatisfied with how there took place sex, or that to someone it happened. The orgasm can be enchanting, but after it can roll feeling on me hopelessness – 27-year-old Lea who is in process of searching for a future husband.
Kate, three years staying in happy marriage speaks about similar feelings. She admits that she after sex with the beloved husband often feels apathetic and oppressed: after that as we come off from each other, my mood reduces to zero and can keep for a couple of days.
Lack of logic
From sex we wait for a relaxation and happiness. In fact it on it is also programmed, in the course of the occupations the love produces hormones of happiness and there is a full relaxation of muscles. And it only in terms of physiology. And there is still a psychoemotional component: during sex we feel that we are incredibly close and frank with other person who also opens towards to us. So in what business? Why after such powerful antidepressive occupation there comes anguish? The solution is not in psychology as can seem at first sight, and in physiology.
Modern age has no effect
The nature reserved for us a surprise. Sexologists already nicknamed it poscoital blues (sad after proximity). But it not the invention of the present – post orgasmic alarm and grief tormented still ancient Greeks. As the proof to that can serve the statement of the antique doctor Galen: after the intercourses all animals are sad, except roosters and girls. Probably, the Greek was not a big expert on women, time did not consider their anguish.
The thing is that the orgasm causes strong positive changes in an organism, but after the highest point of pleasure was passed, the body is forced to return to the usual state. And on contrast with euphoria felt just the norm begins to seem insufficient.
At the chemical level
During an orgasm the sites of a brain involved in production of dopamine are activated. It is hormone which is emitted when receiving pleasure, for example it is actively produced when we feel like lovers. The scientist came to such conclusion. Also, during an orgasm, the activity of a cerebellar tonsil which is responsible for sensation of fear considerably decreases.
And after the storm of happiness and fun ceases, the activity of a cerebellar tonsil responsible for fear increases, we appear face to face with the progressing concern. It is possible to compare it to a hangover after the rough and incredibly cheerful party.
It’s in your head
Therefore do not worry if after sex you suddenly feel upset. The point is not that you chose not and that it made everything not so, and only in your physiology. Just some people transfer hormonal storms quietly, and some – is painful. And if you belong to the second category, do not hurry to complain to girlfriends or doctors. Just wait when your precious brain adjusts from one state to another.
According to the psychotherapist and the sexologist Natalie Parotoni, next day after night of rough sex, really, can cover a depression, I know cases when “hangover” lasted for 4 days. There was no desire something to do – to work, be engaged in the house, a hobby – interest in life in general vanished. If we are strongly horny, at us dopamine considerably increases. It gives joy, energy, forces for the movement, flirtation, long sex. But the surplus leads it to the fact that dopamine depots are exhausted. And dopamine receptors literally hide that not prerogative. That a system it was restored, it is necessary to give to an organism time. At the same time to couples which long ago together, it is important not to depreciate a quiet relationship and to remember that for strong emotions at the beginning of a relationship they are crying, for example, fatigue, jealousy or scandals.